Overcoming Resistance to Taking Breaks

In a world that glorifies being busy and productive, taking breaks can often feel like a luxury reserved for the lazy. But what if I told you that breaks are not just about having a moment of rest? They’re crucial investments in your well-being and productivity. In this post, we'll dive into the common barriers and resistance to taking breaks and explore strategies to help heart-led high-performers embrace self-care unapologetically.

Introduction:

Let me know if this sounds familiar: you're racing through the day like a busy bee going so fast that you swore you just heard the buzzing sound of your rapidly flapping wings. You’re checking tasks off the to-do list at record speed. You’re hell bent on getting through the muddy mire of requests, questions, and demands in your inbox. You’re rectifying your calendar. Oh, and that to-do list you were so proud of just doubled in size. Sound familiar?

Welcome to the whirling daily spiral of hustle culture, where the badge of honor is worn not by those who stop to catch their breath but by those who sprint tirelessly toward the ever-elusive finish line. Would you believe me if I told you that the true measure of success isn't found in the never-ending pursuit of getting *ish done? What if, beyond the chaotic deadlines and demands, there lies a quiet, calm revolution waiting for you to embrace it?

In this digital landscape we call the internet, hidden among the sea of trending TikTok videos, lies a beacon of hope for the weary souls who dare to dream of a different path. Yes, you made it to the right place to embark upon a journey to reclaim what's been lost in your relentless pursuit of survival and productivity: your right to rest.

But before we dive headfirst into the world of self-care, let's take a moment to understand what has brought us to this place of deeply valuing busyness.

Understanding the Barriers to Breaks

For most of us, when we took our first venture to accomplish a goal, we were taught to believe that rest is a luxury reserved for the weak; a sign of giving up on our dreams and our ability to complete the goals expected of us. But breaks aren't only about rest; they're strategic investments in our most valuable asset – ourselves.

In my early 30’s, I somehow got into the relentless rhythm of being forever busy. I remember it so clearly because I was so busy (with work and fun) that I didn’t even have time to read through my mail and pay my bills. It wasn’t because I couldn’t afford them, I literally just–for weeks on end–never had a moment to sit down. Part of my life was about showing up and proving myself at work and the other part was about partying hard to balance out the work I was doing. I didn’t realize that rest was a third part needed to actually provide that balance and so I was left exhausted and depleted. It wasn't until I hit energetic rock bottom, on the brink of burnout, that I realized the true cost of my obsession with being the hard-working busy bee adventurous socialite that I was.

As I had no choice but to face my exhaustion and rest, I grappled with the onslaught of guilt that came with saying “no” to work travel or to a cool weekend hiking trip. I started to question the beliefs behind this guilt that kept me addicted to always doing and the serious FOMO that I was feeling. It wasn’t easy but I challenged the idea that rest was a sign of weakness and embraced the crazy idea that self-care isn't selfish – it's essential.

I actually have a person in my life who has shown me how to find life balance with rest: my mom. Through trial and error and remembering what self-care practices I observed growing up in her home, I discovered that my own limiting beliefs were my barriers to taking essential breaks. 

So let's see what was really behind the barriers, shall we? 

Grab a cup of tea, kick off your shoes, and let's break free from the chains of busyness, one breath at a time.

Why We’re Resistant to Taking Breaks:

1. Fear of Falling Behind: The mere thought of taking a break sends shivers down the spine of many ambitious, type A folks. After all, it's not just a pause from work; it's a break from the relentless pursuit of success. For most, the opposite of success means failure and ain’t nobody got time for that, right? The fear of falling behind weighs on our subconscious, promising that everyone else around us will succeed but not us, we’ll miss that opportunity if we slow down even one tiny bit. Contrary to these strong beliefs we have, breaks aren't actually the enemy of progress. They’re actually essential to making real progress. 
2. Cultural Norms: Do you cringe at the thought of a world where the hustle never sleeps, where productivity is the currency of success? Well, I don’t know if you noticed but this, my dear one, is the reality we inhabit – a world where societal norms dictate that busyness is next to godliness. From the boardroom to the bedroom, the pressure to perform is omnipresent, leaving little room for rest and rejuvenation. Ugh, when are you going to be able to recharge those batteries?
3. Perceived Self-Worth: Let’s face it, people approve of you if you’re busy. And, well as a human and all, we depend on feeling that sense of belonging and acceptance that comes with said approval. If life is like a play, busyness takes center stage, applauded on by an audience hungry for validation. Its a self-perpetuating cycle. We've been taught to equate our worth with how long we can spend our time in doing, measuring our value by the length of our to-do lists and the number of hours we clock in. But think about it. Is your worth truly determined by the number of tasks you complete? Or is it determined by your ability to show up and be your whole human self in this crazy world?

Cultural Views Around Productivity

1. Glorification of Busyness: Our capitalist culture worships at the altar of productivity, idolizing the struggle and demonizing the natural need for rest throughout the day. From social media influencers to corporate CEOs, the message is clear: be busy = be successful. Doing #allthethings is a badge of honor, worn proudly by those who dare to dream big and work even bigger. This isn’t to ignore the fact that it indeed often takes grit and hard work to succeed but instead this is to highlight that even as we work hard (and especially if this is the case) we pause often to keep ourselves in balance and cared for.
2. Negative View of Breaks: High-performing individuals– like company leaders, entrepreneurs and moms of young children– must get things done. Like, if they don’t do it, it won’t get done, and there will be negative consequences for themselves and for others. Feeling the pressure, anyone? For them, breaks are not moments of rest but opportunities for failure, reminders of their inability to keep up with the relentless pace of progress. But what if I told you that breaks aren't signs of weakness but symbols of strength – testaments to our willingness to prioritize self-care in a world that values self-sacrifice?

Benefits of Overcoming Obstacles to Breaks

There’s plentiful research that shows the correlation between breaks and enhanced productivity. From cognitive function to creativity, the evidence is clear: breaks aren't just good for the soul; they're essential for the mind. Research also demonstrates the positive impact of mindfulness on stress reduction. As mentioned in a University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill article about taking breaks, “while it may seem counterintuitive, taking regular breaks can actually help you be more productive than working without stopping.” Just a few of the benefits of taking breaks includes:

1. Breaks reduce stress. Breaks help you decompress and in that way they help increase your resilience and deal with challenges in a more skillful way. Breaks also give the “concentration” center of your brain a chance to recharge and replenish after working so hard to focus.
2. Breaks get you motivated. Imagine trudging along doing the same task for hours on end. You wouldn’t get very far, would you? Maybe you would, but how would the quality of that work turn out? When we take breaks, we give a little pause to all our working parts and we can remember why we’re doing what we’re doing in the first place.
3. Breaks improve your productivity. Slowing down and taking frequent breaks gives the body the pause it needs to take care of itself and perform maintenance. When you feel good in the body and heart, you are in a better state of mind to take on the challenges of your workload.
4. Breaks improve your memory. Is that word forever on the tip of your tongue but never quite makes it out? Or did you forget to do something you were supposed to do–again? It’s probably because you’re going at the speed of light and not slowing enough to pause and let the body function in the way it needs to take care of itself. 
5. Breaks boost creativity. Sometimes you just can’t see a solution because your mind is in overdrive and the creative parts of it are just too dang tired to function fully. Also our most creative ideas, our aha moments, usually happen when we’re at ease, not when we’re trying to force it to happen.

So the next time you find yourself hesitating to take a break, remember this: you're not just replenishing your energy reserves; you're investing in your most valuable asset – yourself.

Looking for a good place to start? Download this worksheet to determine how you’re going to implement each of the 3 strategies mentioned below to overcome your resistance to taking breaks.

Strategies for Overcoming Resistance

Now that we've gotten clear about why we’re so resistant to breaks and why its worth it to find a way around that resistance, it's time to shed some light on the tools needed to calm our frenetic daily lives. 

Let’s do a little visualization, shall we? Imagine yourself standing at the edge of a vast forest, each tree a mysterious testament to the complexities and strength of nature. Now as you slowly walk into the woods, you notice a path winding through the smaller trees, calling for you to follow its winding course. This, my friends, is the path to self-care, and I invite you to walk it with me.

Before we take our first step, let me share a lesson I've learned from my years as a professional in the wellness industry. Our wellness is something that needs constant nurturing just like that monstera plant in the corner. If you’re anything like me, you’re on your 3rd or 4th plant because you didn’t tend to it the way it needed. It’s the same with taking breaks. Self-care requires nurturing and cultivation. It's not enough to take a pause here and there; we must create a healthy habit of resting throughout the day each day.

Here are a few strategies to help you overcome resistance and embrace the transformative power of breaks:

1. Intentional Scheduling: Instead of haphazardly scattering your time like breadcrumbs, take a moment to map out your day with purpose. Schedule regular breaks like sacred rituals that honor your wellbeing. honoring the divine sanctuary of rest within you. It doesn’t have to take long. Even 1 min makes a difference! By carving out dedicated time for breaks, you not only replenish tour energy reserves but you also cultivate a deeper sense of presence and mindfulness in your daily life. Need a little guidance? Check out my free 30 min training on setting daily intentions in less than 5 mins a day. In this training you’ll also learn my method for taking tiny pauses throughout the day that make a big impact on focus and productivity. 
2. Mindfulness Practices: Close your eyes and take a deep breath. Allow the gentle rhythm of your breath to anchor you in the present moment. This is the essence of mindfulness – a simple yet profound practice that has the power to transform your relationship with breaks.
   By bringing awareness to the present moment, we cultivate a sense of spaciousness within ourselves, allowing us to break free from a hectic pace of life and embrace the fullness of life's precious moments. Try out my free guided meditation that you can do any time, anywhere to receive the calming benefits of mindfulness all in the space of 5 minutes. 
3. Setting Boundaries: Boundaries are sacred as they protect the sanctity of your time, energy, space and more. Get clear on what support you need in order to take more pauses to care for yourself. In honoring these needs and asserting your boundaries around them, you reclaim your sovereignty and create space for rest and rejuvenation.

As the softness coach, I've had the privilege of working with high achievers who've grappled with the guilt of taking breaks. From executives to creative designers, the fear of falling behind is a universal struggle. Beyond all the chaos of deadlines and demands, there lies a glimmer of hope – the realization that breaks aren't luxuries to be earned but necessities to be cherished.

The pursuit of productivity has left us parched and weary. But hopefully this journey has left you with some ideas on how to replenish yourself along the way. As we conclude our journey to break free from the chains of the throes of being forever busy, remember that taking breaks isn't a sign of weakness but a testament to your dedication to your being whole. By understanding the barriers, learning the benefits, and adopting strategic approaches to embracing self-care unapologetically, you're not just reclaiming your time – you're reclaiming your well-being and vitality. It's a subtle shift, a simple choice, but the impact is profound.

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